Samhain Publishing

It was a pretty good book, I think. A different book. Lone Irish werewolf with a blood vendetta finds himself in, of all places, Sydney, Australia. Trapped in a cage by his most hated enemy. The readers seemed to like it. I had so much fun writing it, I knew immediately I wanted to go back there. There were characters whose stories begged to be told. Minor characters who weren’t in the slightest bit satisfied with being backseat drivers. Those characters DEMANDED I write about them. They all but leaped out of my laptop and smacked me on the head. And then…
…I fluffed about.

I wrote a novella for another publisher. I reworked an existing novella into a full-length novel in an ambitious experiment that crashed and burned. I wrote numerous Flash Fictions and mucked about on my blog. I wrote another novella. I subconsciously did everything I could to avoid writing the next book in the Savage Australia trilogy. Why?

Because I was scared. Savage Retribution was my first full-length book. It made it to #2 on the MBaM list. It reviewed reeeally well. What if I couldn’t do it again? What if I couldn’t write another novel? God, what if the lightning didn’t strike twice?

Panic is a hideous thing for a creative person. It stifles. It devours one’s self-confidence. I’ve spent the last eleven months (yes, it’s been that long since I finished Savage Retribution) doubting every word I’ve written. I’ve started Savage Annihilation (Peter Thomas’s story) and Savage Transformation (Detective Jackie Huddart’s story) so many times I think my laptop has run out of different ways to save them. I’ve plotted (something I never do) both of them up to the fifth or sixth chapter. I’ve created detailed character charts and descriptions, again, something I never do. I’ve drawn up timelines. Created maps. I’ve even, in the case of Savage Annihilation, created a fictitious Outback town, elected a Mayor, appointed a school principal, a fire chief, a doctor, dentist…none of whom will, as far as I know, make an appearance in the book. Why? Because I’m fluffing about. Because I’m scared.

And as the days turn into weeks and the weeks into months, my fear has intensified and – God, help me – mutated into anger. I’m now not only scared I can’t write another book, I’m angry I didn’t bloody well just do it (thank you, Nike, for that wonderful phrase) when I finished the first one. So every day now I’m existing in a perpetual state of scared contempt. Can I tell you it’s exhausting?

Now at this point in time I know you are wondering…what the hell are you on about, Lexxie? Is there a point to this ranting? Yes, there is.

Last night, while fluffing about on the net and watching Australian Idol when I should have been writing, my Samhain editor IM’d me, just to find out how I was. The relationship between a writer and her/his editor is more important than anyone could know. In all honesty, I was worried to tell her about my current state of mind. But she is wonderful. Truly wonderful. So I did tell her. I blurted it all out. She listened to it all, and then said something very simple. “Your readers will still be there when you release another Savage – just get writing now”. And it dawned on me. They will be still there. Definitely a year older, but still there all the same. They won’t be sticking little pins into tiny effigies of me in the meantime. They won’t be plotting to kidnap my dog and demand I write the book they’ve been waiting for. They won’t be spending every day sending out bulk emails labeling Lexxie Couper a fraud. They will still be there and in the interim, my writing will continue to develop so when they do finally get the chance to pick up the next Lexxie Couper book they’ll be taken for the ride of their life.

And you know what? I’m not scared anymore. And I’m not angry. I’m excited. Really excited. And the characters are excited. I can feel them chomping at the bit waiting to be released. Waiting to burst free of my imagination and run amuck. So thank you, Heidi. You truly have no idea how much you helped me last night.

And now, if you’ll all excuse me, I have a book to write. Detective Peter Thomas calls. He’s headed for the Outback on the tail of a werewolf killer. It’s going to get reeeeeal nasty.