I was coming up short for topics to discuss today, so I turned to my eleven-year-old son and said, “Any ideas for my blog?”
He gave me his infamous smirk-face. “Why don’t you do the cupcake thing?”
I had to laugh. At the start of the school year, I suggested that he edit one of his short stories. Big mistake. Like most kids (and probably quite a few adults), he hates to revise his work. I mean passionate, stomp-the-feet, slam-stuff-around, would-rather-clean-his-room HATE!
I spoke to his teacher and she confirmed that she was having a tough time getting her students to revise their papers. She asked if I could speak to the class about the importance of editing. Maybe the kids would listen to a published author.
When I walked into the classroom, my son rolled his eyes, latched onto my elbow with a death grip and whispered to me, “Please…not the cupcake story.”
He’s a little dramatic.
I smiled–in the way that only mothers can before they embarrass their kids–and told the class:Your teacher has asked you to turn in your best work, which requires creativity, effort and…several drafts. (The students all moan). Now, wait. Have you ever made cupcakes? (Several hands go up).
Well, a first draft of a story is like a chunk of cake inside a cup. All the ingredients are edible, mixed up and cooked. Delicious? A little. Pretty? Not really. And honestly, does your teacher want a chunk of cake in a cup? Imagine what grade she’ll give you when she compares your submittal to all the other beautiful cupcakes that get turned in. Will she give yours a second glance?
Let’s work a little harder. Go back to that first draft and carefully spread on beautiful, descriptive words. Call it the icing. Make sure to include all your senses—sight, smell, taste, sound, touch—as you layer on the goodness. How about colors? No need to stick to white frosting when you could use various shades of the rainbow. Is it a scary cake? Maybe a black frosting will do.
Looking better? Do a third draft. Maybe you want to change a word here and there to smooth out the bumpy spots. Does your dialogue pop and sing inside the icing swirls? If not, go back to the kitchen. You want your cupcake to stand out when it is lined up next to all the others.
In your fourth draft, add a few emotion sprinkles. If you are making a love cake (the boys in the class all groan), sprinkle on candy hearts, some broken, maybe. If your cake is scary you could weave gummy worms into that black frosting (the boys all cheer). Make sure the emotion sprinkles are there to give your cupcake depth. Like 3-D.
In the next draft, you want to grab your teacher’s complete attention. You want her to take that first bite and not be able to stop until she eats the last crumb. Do you have enough interesting flavors to entice her taste buds? If not, add a hot candy, dark chocolate shavings, a mint chip, or something that will really surprise her.
Do all that and your hunk of cake will become a cupcake of art. Your teacher will thank you for your efforts. Trust me, so will your readers.
At the end of my little spiel, the students clapped. My boy gave me his lopsided grin and dipped his head ever so slightly. He still loved me. The classroom erupted in chatter about cupcakes and I got out of there. Did my analogy hit home? Who knows? You are welcome to try it on your children and see if it helps them with their homework, or use another food group, like pizza.
My son warns that I should never repeat the cupcake story in class again, but he did remember it today. So my job here is done.
Anyone else hungry?
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Kimberley, that was a great post! A very clever story, and maybe I’ll try that when working with my kids on editing their work
Thank you!
Glad you liked it, Fedora. Gotta be sneaky with kids. Teach them without them knowing its a lesson, you know. Oh, and colorful, yummy food always helps.
Thank you for stopping by!
Kimberley